It sounds like you're navigating a really dark time, man.
Some things that have helped me reset in the past:
• the easiest way to make friends is to go volunteer somewhere. doing hard things with people is the only way i've found to deepen relationships. you will want to hang out with people you've picked up trash with, but maybe not folks you've played pickleball with
• spend 12 hours bicycling in one direction on Saturday, and then bicycle back home on Sunday
• no booze, no weed, no cigs
• it sounds like you also want companionship. the way to find a life partner comes naturally from the other things: making deep friendships via volunteering, resisting the algos, being healthy, etc.
• all of these probably require energy that you don't think you have. set a 5:00am alarm and your brain will eventually accept that your body wants to do the new thing
Dude. This comment of yours made me quite angry. I feel insulted, sort of like Dostoyevsky would feel getting writing advice from an average run-of-the-mill, unsuccessful chicklit writer. Also made me realize that I'm in a much better spot than you, and wouldn't trade with your position for all the money in the world.
Because it sounds like you're just clueless, or have the emotional intelligence of a teenager, or just lacking life experience. All of the things you mentioned are useless, some are harmful, to the point that I wonder what exactly was in your mind when you made this thread.
Was there a genuine desire to help? Then I should probably mail you a bank account. I'd use the money for people in need, not for myself. But I think it's more likely that you just felt some sort of a need for validation, that seems to be the main driving force behind it.
Yeah, I'm admittedly pretty clueless! I'm trying to learn
Very sorry I rubbed you the wrong way. I wanted to share some things that have helped me, but it may have come off as prescriptive/condescending. Sorry about that
